Windy Mountain Breakdown

No man is an island, but every good woman deserves her own mountain.

At least, I think I do. But until I find a way to get one, I'll have to suffer a while longer in Ohio.

The music I love sometimes helps to make that easier. In fact, it has really been my salvation. Nothing replaces a good cry, but when it's time to move on and get back to living, music leads the way for me. Before I finally forced myself to pick up an instrument and sing again, I left myself few options. Slam doors. Cry whenever the kids weren't looking. Leave angry messages. Scream hurtful truths. It was ugly, unproductive, unwell. Singing and playing, even in a shaky voice, has transformed everything, and all I can do is give my life over to it.

One of the best gifts I ever gave myself was a recording called "Windy Mountain" by Pete and Joan (affectionately known as Nondi) Wernick (Pete and Joan are in the center in the accompanying photo). It is a beautiful collection of just really good traditional songs, just the two of them singing, or Joan singing alone. It's all the more beautiful to me because it comes from two people I admire deeply as much for their love and respect for each other as their work. When I bought it last year, Joan kind of warned me that I might not like it because of her singing. Yet hers is the kind of voice I most admire -- powerful, deep, honest, real. There isn't a song on that recording that I don't love. I so appreciated the chance in October to tell them both how much it has meant to me.

And tonight, this one suits me. In fact, it suits me most days. When it all comes down around me, I remind myself that, one way or another, I'll get to that mountain, even if it's alone and with only with minutes to spare. The view will have been worth it, I am certain.

Windy Mountain (trad.)

(Refrain)I'd like to be upon a windy mountain
Where the treetops drape the sky
Then I would forget all my worries and my trouble
I'll just let the wind blow them by

Let me hear the leaves on the trees when they are singin'
Just a moment of relief is all care
For I've got no sorrow, no heartaches, or sadness
As long as I can see the trees this way

* Refrain

Tell my old lover in care you should see him
Just how much I love he'll never know
I've gone to rest away upon the mountain
Where the howling wind will always blow

* Refrain

Oh, friends bury me way upon the mountain
Where that old wind will always blow
For I want to rest alone on the mountain
Where the howling wind will always blow

* Refrain